Focus on your strengths and make them stronger every day.

TA4MC Focus on your strengths and 

make them stronger every day. 

The theme of the day was parental influence

I am listening to the audio book by Zappo’s CEO Tony Hsieh called Delivering Happiness. I am only about thirty minutes in and he has discussed his childhood where in the Asian Culture the stress is on academia, musical performance and community service.  His parents wanted what they thought was best for him: Acceptance into Harvard, a medical degree and to be able to play multiple instruments.

I found these parents forcing dreams or expectations the theme of the day. Before going to work I was exposed to the ABC Family movie Ice Princess. It is a story of two girls who were forced to live the dreams of their respective mothers. The smart girl who was directed to be a Harvard Grad, wanted to be a figure skater and the other girl who was the daughter of an Olympic hopeful and forced to be a figure skater, just wanted to be normal and go to college. So drama ensues and the girls switch

.

Today at work, I saw a girl in tears because she wanted a certain pair of glasses that her parents and grandparents kept telling her were “too old for her”. She was overwhelmed and broke down into tears because the frame they wanted her to have was too small and did not look attractive on her. The grandfather ended up buying both to settle the squabble between the mother and daughter.  As a salesperson it was good for my commission but as a parent, it left a sour taste in my mouth. Why would we force things on our children that they do not like or they do not have a passion for?

Growing up my parents wanted me to go to college. Round peg, square hole but I still went. I tried becoming what I thought was my dream of being a musician and went to a tech school for musicians where I have a certificate of performance from now a defunct school. I have an Associate’s degree, in Communications and Media Design. A Bachelor’s degree in Business Management,  and 32 credits that along with 8 weeks of student teaching gave me a State of Nevada teaching license. It also created an amount of student loan debt than I care to talk about. But none of my education has leaded me to achieve true heartfelt goals and that is very frustrating.

Wisdom comes with age and the more I look back I really get concerned as a parent how do I avoid making those mistakes. How as a parent can I discover my child’s strengths so that I can help them blossom and how can I minimize her weakness so they are not a hindrance in her development.  Is forcing a child to practice, study and master topics or skills they have no passion for really what is best for them?

Tonight I got a quote on my g+ account by Deepak Chopra “If a child is poor in math but good at tennis, most people would hire a math tutor. I would rather hire a tennis coach”. I hope I have the ability to see my child’s strengths and do everything to forge them like a master blacksmith than to dull her blade with skills she has no passion, talent or need for.